May 29, 2008-Pooping

This night when when we went to visit Joshua one of us started to change his diaper and he started to poop. So while we were waiting for him to fill his pants we noticed that he was making hilarious faces. We only got pictures at the end, so they are toned down a little bit, but we still thought it was funny.

May 28, 2008

When Brian and I went to visit Joshua this day we were surprised to see his face without obstruction. He had yanked everything out of his face. It was fun to be able to see his face; it was the first time we had seen him without tubing. He was doing okay without the oxygen because he hadn't yanked the tubing out that long ago, so we were able to take a picture before everything got put back in.

Superstitions

I went in for my 6-week post baby check up after Minna was born. I asked if there was a reason I haven't been able to carry a baby to term. The doctor said there was no real way to tell with me. So since the doctor is unable to tell me why I have my babies when I do, I will have to rely on my own superstitions. These are the things I think make me go into labor.

1-Complaining about the uncomfortableness of being pregnant. A couple of weeks before Joshua was born I decided that I had been a good uncomplaining pregnant lady long enough and I was starting to get uncomfortable. So I started to whine a little bit, then Joshua was born. When I was pregnant with Minna I waited quite a while to complain. I felt like I should just be grateful I was pregnant, then around 32-33 weeks I decided I was starting to get big and it was hard to sleep. Well then Minna came shortly after. Brian says the kids don't want to make me uncomfortable so when I say that I am uncomfortable they come. So if I have another baby and I am not complaining, its not because I am comfortable or loving being pregnant, I am just trying to cook the baby long enough. But once I hit 36 weeks I will whine away.

2-Ordering maternity clothes online. I can buy maternity clothes from the store just fine, but when I ordered maternity clothes when I was pregnant he was born before they were even delivered. Then I ordered some maternity clothes when I was pregnant with Minna, I got to wear each shirt one time and then she was born.


3-I will have babies around the same time my friend Bree has her babies. Joshua was born 4 days after her first, and Minna was born 3 days before her second.

So since the doctor has no idea why I have my babies when I do, I have my own superstitions, that I may worry about if we have another one.

Feelings from the last few months about the NICU

I debated in my mind whether to put this post in the current stuff blog, or this blog. I decided that while these feelings happened recently, it made more sense to put it with the other NICU stuff.

These last few months I have been suprisingly sensitive about Joshua being in the NICU. I know part of it is just that time of year, where I can look back and go two years ago my life revolved around pumping and going to the NICU. But I don't remember being this upset about it last year. Little things set me off like shortly after Minna was born I was in the store and a new baby always brings comments especially from pregnant women. Well I was talking to this pregnant woman and I asked her when she was due. She said she was 28 weeks along and she was due in September. She then said that she wished that she didn't have to go through the whole summer being pregnant and wished that her baby was here now. Now I know she didn't mean that she wanted to have a preemie just to not be pregnant, but something about her being exactly how far along I was with Joshua and then saying she wished the baby was here, set me off. I had to leave quickly to keep from saying something which probably would have been not nice.

I think part of it has to do with the birth of Minna. I thought that having a baby, especially a more normal baby would make everything easier on me. Part of it is just comparing what life with Minna is like compared to what life with Joshua being a baby was like. I didn't realize how difficult it was to take care of Joshua as a baby, I just did it. I knew it was more difficult than having a term baby, and I secretly envied the life of people with term babies, but I just did it and thought it was a little harder than normal.

Then I had Minna and I realized the difference. I really noticed it when I realized how easy it was to take Minna somewhere. To go somewhere with Minna I just need a diaper bag with diapers and wipes, a carseat, water for me, and a nursing cover. When Joshua was a baby I needed the diapers and wipes, the binky (not really a big deal, except I forgot it one time, and then it was a big deal), the carseat, and a stroller to haul around the apnea monitor, and the oxygen tank, and either a nipple shield, or a bottle of pumped milk to feed him with.

Then to get Minna to nurse I just need somewhere to sit to get her hooked up, and some water and I am good to go. (Sometimes I am literaly going chasing Joshua around while nursing). With Joshua I had to put on the nipple shield, which was sometimes harder than attaching the baby, weave the oxygen tubing through my clothes so it blew around his face, and then try to get him to nurse. Nursing was a project, but a large part of that came from his enlarged andoids and I also realize that nursing Minna is easier because I have nursed before.

I think that Minna's birth gave me the chance to fully recognize the feelings of stress and worry I had about Joshua. I am grateful that Joshua's preemie experience went realitively well. And this rant has made me feel better. I am glad I finally got around to it.